The real sand beaches, in the north
You can count them on one hand and almost all of them are in the north. Golden Bay is the easiest to reach, wide, golden, with umbrellas, a bar and a direct bus from Valletta. Ghajn Tuffieha, right next door, means going down 180 steps, which filters the crowd and rewards the effort with a far wilder setting. Mellieha Bay, the largest in Malta, has the double advantage of shallow water for tens of metres and easy bus access, which makes it the beach for families and groups. Paradise Bay, right at the northern tip near the Gozo ferry terminal, is smaller but often less packed.
The Blue Lagoon on Comino
This is the image you see everywhere, and it is not a lie: translucent turquoise water between two islets. The catch is the crowd. In July and August, Comino takes several thousand people a day onto a tiny lagoon. Two ways round it: go very early, on the first boat around 9am, or come in May, June or September. Boats leave from Cirkewwa and Sliema. Comino has no village and no shops beyond a few kiosks, so bring your own water.
The coves and natural pools
This is where Malta is most itself. St Peter's Pool, near Marsaxlokk, is a natural pool carved into flat rock, with improvised diving ledges and unusually clear water. Ghar Lapsi, in the south, is quieter and much loved by locals. Wied il-Ghasri, on Gozo, is a narrow cleft between two cliffs reached by steps cut into the stone. None has sand, all of them want water shoes, and all of them are worth the detour.
The beaches of Gozo
Ramla Bay is Gozo's big red-sand beach, the finest in the archipelago for many people, with Calypso's Cave looking down on it. Xlendi, to the south-west, is a small bay wedged between cliffs, more a seaside village than a beach. San Blas, awkward to reach down a steep slope, rewards those who make the effort. Gozo works as a day trip from Malta, the ferry from Cirkewwa takes twenty-five minutes.
What about Sliema and St Julian's?
There is no sand, but there are laid-out rock platforms along the seafront, with ladders, showers and bars. That is everyday swimming for the Maltese and it is perfect for a dip between drinks. St George's Bay, in Paceville itself, is the only small sand beach in the area: handy after a night out, but small and very busy. For real sand you have to head north.
When to go, and what to avoid
The sea is swimmable from June to October, with the heat peaking in August. July and August fill Golden Bay and the Blue Lagoon to the point of spoiling the experience: take June, September or early October instead, when the water is still 25 degrees and the beaches can breathe. Northern beaches fill at weekends with the Maltese themselves. One detail that matters: buses north are long and packed in summer, allow an hour from Sliema.